Advice on Becoming a Bouncy Castle
Adopt a sedentary lifestyle
Extol the virtues of hot air
Lie down in parks and suburban gardens
Only go somewhere if you have been hired to do so.
Remove the word ‘shoes’ from your vocabulary
Become hopelessly appealing to toddlers and drunk people
Remember that every action has an equal & opposite
chance of someone being elbowed in the face.
Secure the best spot at every village fete
Take pride in making small children throw up
Leave every party deflated
Fold up small for easy storage.