Saturday, 31 October 2015

POEM - Pretty Fly (for a poem)

Oh goodness - I've done another one! That's two in one week! Hashtag productivity.

It's another sonnet I'm afraid. This one's a re-imagining of the classic Offspring song Pretty Fly (for a white guy)...

Pretty Fly (for a poem)
While many men are stylish and urbane,
The subject of our tale has no such flair;
And everything he tries, he tries in vain!
His aspirations sunk without a care.

He’s drawn a thirty-one upon his flesh,
And bought the music of Vanilla Ice.
For all that work, he’s still not funky fresh!
He’ll never be a journalist for Vice.

I beg you, darling, give me what I'm owed –
Or I will count in Spanish till I'm paid.
Most ladies think me charming, even though
My countenance is much too pale a shade.

Sometimes distinction comes to those who wait.
(But you can always go on Ricki Lake.)

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