Saturday, 20 September 2014

Pirate Limericks

Ahoy thar! Yesterday was International Talk Like a Pirate day!

I manage to miss it almost every year - but this time round, I was ready! I even wrote some piratical haiku especially for the occasion, then promptly forgot to post them on the right day! Curses! Never mind, here are a few pirate limericks just for you. (I'll save the rest for next year!)

A Change of Career
There once was a First Mate named Smee
Who was frightened of drowning at sea.
So he dumped his career
As a fierce buccaneer,
And he now runs a small HMV.

It's Better than Taking the Bus
There once was a Captain called Jack
Who sailed to Jamaica and back.
When asked why he did it
He slyly admitted,
“I'd swim, but I don't have the knack.”

You wouldn't Steal a Baby
There once was a pirate called Seb
Who robbed movies free from the web.
But his scam was uncovered
By a cop undercover,
And now he reads novels instead.

There once was a Captain named Hook
Who watched telly to learn how to cook.
And, after a fashion,
His muffins were smashing,
And now he's releasing a book.

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