Monday, 22 October 2012

Fancy Dress

Seems a woman can't dress as a zombie
without flashing a flush of her flesh.
This fashion for sexing up costumes
is ruining my fancy dress!

I know that we're all grown up women
and we can't dress like kids any more,
but, tell me, is there a mid-way point?
Or do we jump straight from princess to whore?

It's fine if you want to dress sexy,
but not every costume needs tits.
What happened to our imaginations?
What happened to outfits with wit?

I know that we're all grown up women
and we can't dress like kids, that's for sure.
But, there's got to be some sort of mid point?
I can't go out in my pants any more.

Friday, 12 October 2012

Bad Kisser

When we first met, I found you quite charming
But that impression began to cave in
The first time that I let you to kiss me
And you licked me from forehead to chin.

I knew that you weren't great with women
Now finally I understood why.
(Being able to suck on my tonsils
Is not something I want in a guy. )

I still feel the pang of revulsion
When I think of your molars on mine.
The clash of enamel connecting
Sent chills to the base of my spine.

I know you were just keen to please me,
But your technique was really bizarre.
You formed a tight seal round my head holes -
It's not suppose to be like CPR!

In order to give you some feedback,
(Please know that I'm not one to quibble)
We women don't like to be moistened
with silvery trails of dribble.

Not that it wasn't impressive –
The incredible girth of you tongue –
But the ravenous way that you wield it!
You damn nearly punctured my lung!

If I'd known that you packed so much suction –
Like a back hole in fashionable jeans –
I might have asked you to hoover my carpets:
Euphemisms, unheard, like my screams.

But, now that you're gone, I feel lonely;
Normal kisses just don't fill the space.
Turns out that, though I protested,
I want you to chew on my face.

I saw you gnawing the tonsils of some girl
In the precinct by Iceland today.
And I know for a fact that I've lost you
The Bad Kisser who slipped clean away. 

Sunday, 7 October 2012


I think it must be three, or four,
I've lost my count, not keeping score.
It could be less, it could be more.
I think it must be three, or four.

I know – I'm sure – that I was third.
Not wife, nor mistress. I was lured
by promised love, by gentle words.
I know – I'm sure – that I was third.

The first, a wife, now grey with wear.
The second, with the auburn hair
and me, so slight I'm barely there.
The first, a wife, now grey with wear.

Her perfume, to your shirt, still clings.
The fourth, a blonde, the one who sings
and talks to you of diamond rings.
Her perfume, to your shirt, still clings.

It is too hard to hide a lover.
We each must know about the others.
Change the sheets, discard the covers;
it is too hard to hide a lover.

So, tacitly, I give consent,
by knowing how your time is spent.
Not mine at all; a love for rent.
Still, tacitly, I give consent.

And, each time the thought appals,
I run with haste, escape these walls.
But I'll return to heed your calls.
Half-love preferred to none at all.

Monday, 1 October 2012

News - Shindig at the Leper Chapel

The Shindig event at the Leper Chapel on Newmarket Road was so much fun! And what a beautiful venue!
The whole night was really amazing, and all three of the musicians were incredible! The artist Chen Xi, was also fantastic, and it was so great to be involved in such a multimedia extravaganza!

The room was cold but atmospheric, lit as it was, with candles and fairly lights.

Lovely sound engineer Matt Cooke recorded my set and you can listen to it (and download it) here.

We also got a great review in the local secrets ezine, so I'm really pleased about that.