Wednesday, 26 October 2011

Kinky Boots - a Lipogram

Andy over at hippierage.blogspot.com challenged me to write a lipogram about the fall of the Roman Empire without using the letter U. An impossible task. That was until I found out that some historians consider the fall of Constantinople in 1453 to be the final death rattle for the Roman Empire. When I unearthed the story of Emperor Constantine's purple boots, I knew I'd found my poem.

Kinky Boots - The Last Roman Emperor

A snappy dresser,Constantine,
always down with the latest trends.
Battleward in lilac robes.
A fashionista right till the end.


Sieges didn't stop his flare
for weaving feathers in his hair.
Nor did raging, warring Ottomen
stop him wearing diamonds and pearls like Sophia Loren.

A snappy dresser, Constantine,
defended Constantinople.
Stood by his men in times of strife
wearing chain-mail carved from opals.

 And when, at last, his Empire fell,
Conny let forth an ear-splitting yell:
"Come on lads, let's get the twats
who got blood on my vintage trilby hat."

The snappiest dresser, Constantine,

never strayed far from his pavonine roots.
Soon the Marble Emperor of violet will wake once more,
as patron saint of kinky boots.


2 comments:

  1. did you compose this awesome poem? you are a genius!

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    Replies
    1. Why you don't publish a poem compilation? It would be so nice!

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