'Better than' Sally has done everything
She's got an opinion on every topic
A total nightmare
'Better than' Sally makes conversation
With every blatant exaggeration
'You've been to the moon?
'Oh, I've been there twice.'
She once joined the circus, and has swallowed live mice
And in her garage she's got a doomsday device
She claims to have worked through every vice
She's smoked crack in Brixton
And dealt blackjack in Spain
She's never been through child birth
But she can understand the pain
She's a strange mix of egoism and just being vain
Introduce her to your friends, and you'll never see them again
She's allergic to equations
Once saw an alien invasion
Lost her virginity on THREE SEPARATE OCCASIONS!
'Better than' Sally has been there, done that
And even her T-shirt is better than yours.